almost a Clausen

So remember when I told you I made pickles.
Whelp, I waited the three weeks for the cucumbers to morph into pickles. And they did.. And they're VERY edible..

They're lacking just a little bit of crunch.. I think I'll add some more alum next time.
Yes there will be a next time.

Tomorrow night is tomato canning night at my moms.. A good bottle(which translates into a cheap box) of wine and some boiling, scalding hot, tomato juice on the stove, should make for an entertaining evening.
We always have fun!!!!

Forget the book, I'm writing pet obits now.

SAMANTHA "SAM" ROLLINS
1994 - 2009

It is with deep regret that we announce that
Sam Rollins went to the great cat nip field in the sky
on July 31st 2009

Sam was adopted by her loving humans
Jack and Bev Rollins in 1994. She lived out
her years at 19 Shady Lane, enjoying the many things
that came with living in a country like setting.
Her hobbies included sitting on the screened in porch
watching the many raccoons, deer and birds that
came to visit.
She also enjoyed visiting with her special friend Magic
who stopped by on a daily basis to let her know what she
was missing by being an inside pet.
Sam was a friendly cat meeting all visitors at the door
and inspecting them to make sure they were worthy of
her time. With a little attention, everyone was welcome
with the exception of small children of which she would
hide from under beds or behind the couch.
Sam proved she was a Rollins by being slightly finicky.
She refused all human food presented to her, and would
only eat her special treats if they were given by her
male human, Jack.
She was helpful around the house. But would only help
make the bed if both of her humans participated.
She was very family oriented and would sit in her stool
at the kitchen counter and help Jack work crosswords
and read the paper.
At meal time she often lingered around the table waiting
for her humans to finish their meal before climbing up
on her Bev humans lap for an after dinner cuddle.
Sam enjoyed lounging on the backs of chairs throughout
the house. Her favorite being in the master bedroom
where she could gaze out the window and enjoy
watching nature. Unless of course there was a
thunder storm, and then she could be found hiding
Under the living room love seat.

Sam is proceeded in death by several important
family members including canine brothers, Peppy,
El Cid, Sergeant, and Jack's Yella Fella.
Canine sisters Gretchen and Bridget. And feline brothers
Spook, Simon and Cyrus.
Survivors include her humans Jack and Bev,
Human siblings Kevin (Melissa) Rollins, Kim (Jeff) Wettersten
and Kerri (Scott) Rollins. Feline step sister Snow ball.
Her human cousins, Andrew, Stefanie,
Meredith, Ryleigh, Ross and Elizabeth.
Feline cousin Tessa and canine cousin Pumpkin.

Other survivors include Aunt Sharon and Uncle Bill Burow
along with very special friend Abby Burow.
Big Jacky and Aunt Lou Klage, Don and Julie Lind, and
her many outdoor visitors including Magic.

In lieu of flowers please send cash donations of $50 or more
to Jack and Bev Rollins at 19 Shady lane.

Fermented cucumbers

One time, probably 15 years ago, I tried to make pickles..
It didn't go so well and I gave up..

But my parents have a couple different friends that make "Vodka Pickles", and they are soooooo good.. They're hot and garlicky and hard to come by. So I decided to give pickles another try..
My mom got the recipe for me.. It looked like this.


VODKA PICKLES
In the bottom of a quart jar, place the following:
6 cloves garlic finely chopped
1 tsp. pickling spice
3 red peppers, chopped
6 springs fresh dill or 1 tsp. dill seed
¼ tsp. alum
Wash cukes with brush, cut lengthwise into spears and pack loosely in the quart jar.
Bring to boil: 2 cups of water
3 T. salt
Set off heat and stir in ¼ c. vodka and ½ c. vinegar. Pour over spears to fill jar leaving ½” of headspace. Seal at room temperature. (We sometimes use a hot bath to seal). Store in the refrigerator. Ready to eat in 2-3 weeks.
MUST be kept in the refrigerator.
Note: It takes about 20 small cucumbers to make 4 quarts.

I bought a new pan, the ingredients, some jars, and some canning "tools" and got started.
There were just a couple glitches.

A) it said "3 chopped red peppers". That was pretty vague. "red pepper" in any other recipe means a bell pepper, to me..
but I sized up the jars and thought "3 red bell peppers is going to take up a lot of room in that jar.. That can't be right".
So I thought and thought and thought.. Vodka pickles are hot.. That must mean "hot red peppers". So I bought habenero's (I was just guessing).
B) Three tablespoons of salt.. Every thing I read online said "do not use table salt".. But the recipe didn't specify.
Again, I guessed and used canning/pickling salt.
C) I hear alum is was make them crunchy.. So I added just a pinch more than it said.
D) I've never sealed anything with a water bath..... punt
E) My cukes started out orange????????
F) I bought the cheapest vodka in existence. It seriously had a ring you had to pull on it (like a milk jug).
G) After all was said and done, the ingredients in the jar, the cukes in the jar, the vodka/vinegar mixture in the jar, and a water bath. I inspected the jars and there was MOLD in them.. green/blue floating mold.. Panic.. So I googled.. Did you know that if garlic isn't properly aged, it will turn blue when exposed to vinegar??? Perfectly safe to eat if you can get passed the mold idea.
So I figure I'm going to wait the two weeks for them to "ferment" and the end product is going to be drunken pickles that are too hot, salty and moldy to eat.