Really?

I'm all about free speech (obviously). And music is no exception. Yes there are some questionable lyrics that probably shouldn't be played on the radio.. But the Constitution says we have free speech. And I personally take advantage of that.

As for the radio nothing like a 6 year old girl singing along to Britney's "If you seek Amy". Google the questionability (I don't think that's a word) if you don't already know..
Never mind I'll just tell you (although I hate to say my 12 year old and her friend had to explain it to me.
Say it slowly and think of the game Mad Gab..

IF........ YOU........ SEEK........ AMY......

Hint: do I need to spell it out for you??

Oh I give up. What Britney is really saying is F......U......C.......K....... ME..

You just had an "ah ha" moment, didn't you..

And although Britney's next hit "3" (about her threesome with Peter, Paul and Mary) could easily make her the topic of this post, She is not.

It's actually the radio stations thought process on censorship that has me scratching my head..

Ryleigh and I were in the car tonight when Zac Browns "Toes" came on the radio. We both like this song and sing along to it.
The local radio stations play the edited version so that instead of "Got my toes in the water, ass in the sand" it actually says "Got my toes in the water, toes in the sand". This works out well since I don't allow Ryleigh to say "ass". Although in my opinion it takes away from the song.
But as she finished singing a line in the song that goes "Gonna lay in the hot sun and roll a big fat one. And grab my guitar and play". She says to me "oh that's nice to play on the radio". Pointing out that "rolling a big fat one" makes reference to rolling a joint.. Yes, my 12 year old knows more than she should about such topics (if you know me at all, you know the unfortunate circumstances that have brought us to this point).
So Britney is F..... U..... C..... K...... MEing either before or after her 3some, And Zac Brown is rolling dope (along with thousands of other not so discrete lyrics) But they edited out the word ASS????
Really?

It hurts to be this smart.

There are two things that I really hate. Okay more than two. But for the sake of this post, there are two things that I hate.
Exercise and roller coasters.

It's obvious about the exercise thing. I've gained a little around the middle in the last couple years. And my lack of energy is probably a sign. Lack of strength. blah blah blah.. I'm outta shape.

I'm most worried about the extra pounds. It's not like I'm obese or anything.. But my clothes have stopped fitting. And I really don't want to spend the money to buy bigger clothes. The double chin (that I had even when I was 108 pounds) is not a triple. My granny flags flap when I wave.. Tell tale signs that I need to do something.
I'm also not a guru when it comes to getting in shape. My knowledge comes from watching Bob and Jillian beat up people on The Biggest Loser.
But from what I can gather, the idea of working out is to get you heart rate up, right? To like 120 or above. Can't do that playing facebook.

But I have a solution.. I was watching the Travel Channel last week. The show was all about extreme roller coasters. Some Bill Nye the science guy looking dork, wired him self up to a astronaut level of body monitors. Facial expressions, arousal level (little worried about how that electrode was attached), brain waves and heart rate. And while he was all wired up, he rode roller coasters.
Get this folks. The average heart rate of roller coaster rider is 120.
Now like I mentioned I hate exercise AND roller coasters. But I might just hate exercise more.
So I'm gonna be like Jared from Subway and invent my own weight loss plan.
If I ride a roller coaster like 7 times in a row, my heart rate will be 120 or above for about an hour. The exact time of an aerobics class that would get my heart rate to that level. So the exact time and heart rate I need to lose weight.
There is another bonus to this. Since I can't really aerobicize without my bladder reminding me that it's working, I can ride the roller coaster without wearing a depends.
I'll think of all of you when I'm living large on all the money the Theme parks are going to pay me to ride their rides.