It hurts to be this smart.

There are two things that I really hate. Okay more than two. But for the sake of this post, there are two things that I hate.
Exercise and roller coasters.

It's obvious about the exercise thing. I've gained a little around the middle in the last couple years. And my lack of energy is probably a sign. Lack of strength. blah blah blah.. I'm outta shape.

I'm most worried about the extra pounds. It's not like I'm obese or anything.. But my clothes have stopped fitting. And I really don't want to spend the money to buy bigger clothes. The double chin (that I had even when I was 108 pounds) is not a triple. My granny flags flap when I wave.. Tell tale signs that I need to do something.
I'm also not a guru when it comes to getting in shape. My knowledge comes from watching Bob and Jillian beat up people on The Biggest Loser.
But from what I can gather, the idea of working out is to get you heart rate up, right? To like 120 or above. Can't do that playing facebook.

But I have a solution.. I was watching the Travel Channel last week. The show was all about extreme roller coasters. Some Bill Nye the science guy looking dork, wired him self up to a astronaut level of body monitors. Facial expressions, arousal level (little worried about how that electrode was attached), brain waves and heart rate. And while he was all wired up, he rode roller coasters.
Get this folks. The average heart rate of roller coaster rider is 120.
Now like I mentioned I hate exercise AND roller coasters. But I might just hate exercise more.
So I'm gonna be like Jared from Subway and invent my own weight loss plan.
If I ride a roller coaster like 7 times in a row, my heart rate will be 120 or above for about an hour. The exact time of an aerobics class that would get my heart rate to that level. So the exact time and heart rate I need to lose weight.
There is another bonus to this. Since I can't really aerobicize without my bladder reminding me that it's working, I can ride the roller coaster without wearing a depends.
I'll think of all of you when I'm living large on all the money the Theme parks are going to pay me to ride their rides.